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“ Behind every workshop is a great story.”

In January 2001, I wrote “Confessions of a Choreography Monster,” a story that heralded my recovery from a harrowing dependency on intricate choreography. I’m ashamed to admit that I was recently kicked out of the choreography halfway house due to parole violations involving use of mind-numbing aerobic combinations. I should have known better and I take full responsibility for my relapse. 

Like all addicts, it took a defining moment to set me back on the path to recovery. I recently presented at the International Aquatic Fitness Conference (IAFC) in Ft. Myers, Fla. One of my sessions was called Box & Boogie, a master class that combines kickboxing and aquatic dance choreography. Recently, I was mailed the evaluations and most were very good, but there were three bad ones. On one of the bad ones, my evaluator wrote, “Too much choreography tasking and not enough real workout. He got the workout on the deck.” My first thought was, “Jeez, what a bitch she is.” Eventually I regrouped and realized that my anger was misdirected. I was just miffed because the comments rang true. An addict never wants to face the truth, no matter how self-aware they may be. I KNOW that I focus too much on choreography, sacrificing intensity for flamboyant feats. I KNOW that people come to class to improve their fitness level, not audition for a dance recital. I KNOW all this and I have gotten better, but sometimes I just can’t help myself! 

My fall from grace is not surprising. The recidivism rate for choreography addicts is extremely high. A choreography addict just can’t leave a knee repeater alone. Why stick with a boring repeater when it can be changed into a fun syncopated move? Well guess what? One modification leads to another and before long the knee repeater involves syncopation, gyration, three lever changes, a full 360 turn, and requires five minutes of visual breakdown, bi-lingual instructions, and a video monitor to watch your students flail around. 

Without intervention an addict will eventually hit bottom, in this case, an empty class.
Well, almost empty save for Rebecca Rebok, the front row student who ALWAYS tries to outdo your every move and would NEVER just do a knee repeater. I’d rather refer to her as Rebecca the Enabler. After all, she’s the one who got me in trouble in the first place! I spent my first few years as an instructor trying to win the approval of the Rebeccas. 

I’ve told the story before, but it is worth telling again. During my second year of teaching, I taught a basic step/muscle conditioning class called Basic Training. In no time at all, the class was packed and I had to hand out tickets for admittance. Naturally, none of the Rebeccas would DARE come to my class because it was basic.

Instead, the classroom was packed with exercise novices, all eager to lose weight and get in shape. They loved the class because it was inclusive, fun, and simple to follow. They brought their mothers, their sisters, and their friends. The class was a hit despite a lack of 32-count phrasing and add-on choreography. A packed classroom of happy students having fun and achieving results wasn’t good enough for me. I just couldn’t understand why the Rebeccas shunned my class. Apparently, my class wasn’t hip enough, tough enough, or good enough. Well! We’ll see about that! 

In an effort to learn more, I signed up for my first workshop. Imagine my horror when I discovered that I was the only instructor who didn’t know how to do a mambo. By the time the presenter had added on three 32-count combinations, I was shouting, “WAIT A MINUTE! I’m STILL trying to figure out the FIRST move of the FIRST combination!” 
In retrospect, that workshop was like taking the first hit off a crack pipe. I was high for a week. I craved new moves and I needed more. However, as I signed up for more workshops, I failed miserably at my ability to process this information and use it in ways that would benefit my students. 

However, I did learn lot about workshops. I learned that the best workshops provide you with fun moves, new ideas, and lots of motivation, while other workshops numb you with intricate choreography and turn you into a cueing robot, something akin to a “Stepford” instructor. 

Initially, my students welcomed the new moves I heisted from workshops and the first Rebeccas appeared in class. Hallelujah! In my efforts to impress them, I advanced the level of choreography. The Rebeccas loved it, but my other students struggled. Their smiles soon faded into blank stares of robotic acquiescence. Unfortunately, I lost a lot of regulars in my efforts to promote my own agenda and prove my worth as an instructor. Cued along like robots, those that remained in class eventually turned into “Stepford” students, zombies with slack jaws, vacuous stares, and mime-like movements. How fun!

According to the Group Fitness Law of Attrition, you will consistently lose students over time due to various reasons, but new recruits should keep your classes stocked. However, if your class becomes so complicated that new students are excluded, you will have a dying class on your hands. There is nothing pretty about a class in its final death throes. Picture a large aerobic room or pool with four students, one Rebecca, two loyal regulars, and one poor soul who wandered in for the first time. Now picture a diva instructor, wondering where everyone is and throwing “Mommie Dearest” tantrums. Sound familiar? It does to me!

The only good thing about hitting bottom is staging a comeback. Like many recovering addicts, I have resolved to help others by telling my story. As a continuing education provider and presenter, I now have the opportunity to share my ideas and provide leadership based on real-life experiences, as opposed to textbook morals. I want instructors to feel comfortable about making mistakes AND correcting them. What better way to educate then by sharing your own misadventures! 

I design workshops with two objectives in mind. First of all, I encourage instructors to steal the booty. Let’s be real, theft is a major incentive for attending a workshop. We all need new moves! However, if I am going to provide new moves, you can bet I am also going to suggest ideas on how to implement those moves into classes. 
Secondly, I want instructors to leave my workshops feeling excited and motivated. I want them to feel blessed to be an instructor and inspired to spread health, fitness and joy into the world. This should be the mission of all workshops. 

I’d like to think that I am successful because I teach from reality rather than a pulpit. Former addicts make the best counselors because they already opened forbidden doors and know what lies behind them. They explored the darkness, made mistakes, and then learned and grew from those mistakes. They also have some pretty funny stories to tell!

Coming September 1st. Translating mistakes into workshops. The Fall 2003 workshops, The Disco Deck and Step Booty/Ab Kill



Stay Fit and Motivated!
Mark

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